Friday, February 23, 2007
You're soliciting me for what?
Exercise: Two hours of hard core jam and speed skating. :)
Last night I was at the rink skating around minding my own business when this chic approached me. All she did was say, "Hey!" and when I turned back to look at her, she handed me this quarter sheet of paper that was folded in half. I said, "What's this?" in a less than thrilled tone just because papers like those are usually the kind that you find under the wiperblades on your car advertising scam jobs and shit. I unfolded the paper and read it. I guess this girl is part of some roller derby type of club or some such thing. I noticed that her and her friends had on these black shirts that referred to it (they've been there before too wearing those shirts). The paper was an "ad" for their group. I guess they want me to join. Based on the fact that I'm the only one they gave this to, it would seem they had been secretly "scouting" me. Come to think of it, these may be the same chics that were there a couple weeks ago taking pictures.
Anyway, after I read it, all I could do was roll my eyes and try to think of the closest place I could dispose of it without being overly noticeable. The bathroom - Yah, that's the ticket! Don't get me wrong, it's somewhat flattering that they think I'm that good and want me to join their little club but let's weigh the facts here.
1.) I've never quite understood the whole point of roller durby. To me, it's just kind of....well.....STUPID. For whatever reason, my mind tends to liken it to female mud wrestling. YUCK!
2.) I haven't spent 30 years of my life perfecting my skills as a skater to play "chase and block".
3.) Based on the women I saw wearing the shirts, they didn't look like they were any older than their early 20's. I mean holy shit, if that's the case, I've been skating a good ten to fifteen years longer than they've been alive.
4.) I can't help but wonder if part of the reason they invited me was the fact that they skate like shit and thought I would be the asset to their team that would get them out of a losing streak. Yah, I know that sounded pretty pompous of me but damn it's true. These chics skated like people who still haven't completely mastered balance and have lead in their ass.
5.) They wear protective gear even when "freestyle" skating - YIKES! I've never worn that shit nor will I ever. It's uncomfortable and gets in the way. Besides, I think skating without it makes a better skater because you're more likely to stick the landing the first time if you know the alternative is busting your ass. LOL Oh and for all of you out there who want to give me "the speech" - BITE ME!
So anyway, thanks but no thanks. Roller Derby just ain't so cool in my book.
Once again I don't have anything for the "something different" files so I'm just going to leave it here today.
Til next time....
Knocked Off By The Fashion Diva
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