Wednesday, January 05, 2005
Rant Central Headquarters
On an average day, I'm a very calm and quiet person who is happy enough just to be left alone to get on with the duties of the day. On the flipside, there are some things and some people that really just bust my chops and rub my buttcheeks raw. Read on and see what I mean...
It was how warm last week??? Yes folks something to the tune of 60. So what is it now? Cold - Butt cold. All of 20 if that and snow coming down like a banshee. Gotta love Iowa - one of the few places the weather is more fucked up than the people living there. This is only the beginning of my gripes about the weather though. I have an even bigger one involving the ass munches who attempt to plow our streets and driveways and the people who ignorantly think that 4 wheel drive is going to do something for them in this weather. Why? Oh gosh, where do I being? Oh yeah, Mr. Snowplower.
Around 1am this morning I woke up to the sound of scraping outside. Upon hearing this, I thought maybe there was going to be some improvement over the last couple of years attempts at plowing which usually occurred two days after the fact. Pffft! Yeah right - clearly a period of temporary insanity on my part. They plowed alright. The streets only and in the process managed to push a big ridge (about 6" or so) of the white stuff across the end of our driveway. When I looked out this morning and say the handy work, I found myself shaking my fist and giving a one finger salute to Mr. Snowmover. Not that he would have seen me doing it even if he had been out there since his head was evidently stuffed up his butt when he was grappling with the snow.
Later, when I was almost ready for work and prepared to have to shovel my way out, I heard some more scraping outside. What? Did you finally decide to come back and finish the job? Yep, sure enough that's what he was doing. He finished it so well that the 6" mound had grown to 12"! WTF? We pay 120 bucks to the association for this?! Grrrrrrrrr! There is a property management company out there who is just going to love me after it receives my nastygram!
Luckily, the mound wasn't as evil as it looked and I made it out with no trouble. That didn't curb my muttering nasty words as I drove down the street which Mr. Snowplowman was so nice to half clear. To add insult to injury, the half assed plow job that he did do was enough that it exposed the sheet of ice under the snow. He may as well just left it there as it would have been a hell of a lot easier to navigate. The trouble didn't stop there. As I was slowly making my way the ten miles to work at ten to seven in the morning, I got out on the interstate which wasn't too horrible but I could tell there were icy patches at the least. I got on the ramp at the interchange (commonly referred to a mixmaster here) to go from one interstate to the other, I had someone come up behind me, ride my ass, and honk at me for not moving fast enough. Hello second one finger salute of the morning. I couldn't believe someone would have the audacity to do something like that. Yo Dumbshit - ICE, BRIDGE, BEND IN THE ROAD - what part don't you understand?! ARGH! Fucker!
What a wonderful day and it only got better. I get to work and things are peaceful enough, well, until SHE shows up. SHE being the woman who sits on the other side of one of my cube walls. More often than not, she bugs the hell out of me anyway more than just about everyone I work with the exception of one of the guys there. Anyway, if I had a dime for every time the woman mentioned having 4 wheel drive on her car blah blah blah blah blah, I would be so rich, the money would be flowing out my ears! I swear it may as well have been Beavis and Butthead feeding the lines as they do. Hey baby wanna see my 4 wheel drive truck? It runs real good in the snow. LOL Other than this woman grating on my last nerve, the workday was stellar.
The commute home wasn't too bad. Considering the weather reports I had heard through the day, it wasn't bad at all but when I arrived back to the neighborhood, that all changed. Nothing like driving through drifts of snow all over the place because once again, Mr. Snowplowman proved to be plow challenged. The guy gave me the creeps too when I went back out to get the mail. I was walking back to the house and as he drove by he kept looking at me in a way that just made my skin crawl - YIKES!
Otay kiddies, I'm outta here. Project Runway is on and I wanna watch.
Until next time.....
Knocked Off By The Fashion Diva
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